A Date Night and Grandpa Gardner
Tuesday, October 21, 2008 at 07:42AM My sweetheart and I went on a date last night, one of the few that we've been able to fit in lately. We're both busy, and it's even more difficult since we've had Sterling's father living with us. Grandpa Gardner is nearly 95 years old, and his body is very healthy for a man his age. His mind, unfortunately, isn't nearly as healthy, and six years ago it became clear he could no longer live alone, so he came to live with us.
He's changed our lives. We love this man, of course; we just didn't anticipate having to find babysitters at this point in time. (smile) Grandpa needs to have someone watching him all the time, and Sterling has assumed that responsibility wonderfully.
Because Grandpa loves to do errands, Sterling takes his father almost everywhere with him. That means that when I'm in the car, I get to sit in the back seat! Not exactly where I thought I'd be when I'm riding in the car with my husband, but the patience and love Sterling shows his father is inspiring, and I am grateful that we are in a position where we can take care of him. But we aren't as free as we had thought we'd be, so our dates are less frequent than either one of us would like.
Sterling has to go out of town today, and I'm leaving for regionals later this week, so Sterling actually took his father to our friend's house yesterday afternoon; they sometimes watch Grandpa when we have to go out of town. That meant that last night we could go on a date! I actually felt giddy when Sterling suggested it.
The humor in the situation is what we planned for our date. Initially, we talked about dinner and a movie, but then common sense set in. Sterling had several errands he needed to do before leaving town, and I hadn't been to the hospital to visit my dad yet. So for our "hot" date we had our glasses tightened, stopped at Wal-Mart, and visited Dad. We did manage to fit in a delicious dinner. And in between it all, I got to sit in the front seat with Sterling and hold his hand. That was enough to make it a date for me!
Reader Comments (48)
((()))reen
Terry M>
You can always have a picnic in bed, you know!!! Bubble baths are great, too...
There are millions of simple ways to continue dating when you have to stay at home; one of my favorites is reading a favorite passage or sharing a loved song, singing along, of course!
I am glad your fil is able to see the love felt for him and know how wanted he is in your lives. May all of us show that to those in need! Keep inspiring us; we love the reminders of how easy it is to be a better person :-D
Thank you for showing that when things are tough there is always a positive there if you look for it...
PS. My favorite story was when you took the family out in the woods for a fall family dinner! WOW!
And what a blessing it must be for you and Sterling to have his father with you. Taking care of an elderly parent or grandparent is not an easy job, but one that will be treasured after. I took care of my grandmother and while it was difficult at the time, I wouldn't have changed a thing!
I also know what you mean about date night being slim and none. I SO enjoy errands with my husband. I don't care if it's a quick bite at Taco Bell, and holdind hands is a must!
Thanks for sharing,
Jacki McHale
Your stories always warm my heart! It's just amazing and after spending a little time chatting with Sterling at convention I know how dear you are to him. He's such a keeper for sure! Can't wait to see you in San Antonio!
Sharon
PS-I'm bringing my Celebrate (Creative Challenge) book so you can sign it. I hope I can find you!
Thank you for being so open about sharing the joys and struggles of having your father-in-law live with you. God bless you as you honor Him by taking care of that dear man. :)
I can totally related. My great aunt Annette came for a holiday visit 5 yrs ago and and has been here with me in Jan 5 yrs. She too could not see living by herself was no longer an option. Health has been relatively good for her young age of almost 100 on Jan 4. It too impacts your life in ways you don't think. I'm glad you got some private time for yourselves it is important. I too need companions to stay with her when not at home.Rubber Hugs Robin Boyer
It sounds like we live somewhat parallel lives. Share a home with FIL (89) who is physically fit but mentally sliding slowly and when we go away we have to have a sitter for him now. Hubby and I don't get a lot of great date nights alone but had a lovely one this past Monday, amazing dinner followed by Celine Dion concert.
And..I frequently get my glasses tightened LOL!
Now if I can just make my SU business as successful as yours...
Sue in Vancouver.
It's a good life!
Terri E.
I thought your comment about religion was interesting. I am not the most spiritual person, but I do believe in a higher being.
I do not mind comments on religion, it is the person who tries to impose their beliefs on me. Thanking God for your Dad doing well in the hospital is not imposing. Telling me there is only one way to believe is imposing.
We have sensitivity training at work. It involve things like race, weight, sex and religion. If I am uncomfortable with ANYTHING someone says, it is considered harassment. That is our gauge.
I have never felt uncomfortable with your comments.
Ellen