My Big, Wonderful Family

Several of you have been curious about my moms—Mom Heather and Mom Pat—and you’ve asked how my family tree actually lays out. So I thought I’d explain it a little. (Warning: There are a lot of photos in this blog, and it didn't work to create a collage, so you'll have to do some scrolling. . . . )

My dad married Mom Heather in 1960.

They had four children; I was the oldest. After me came Kurt, Leslie, and Vonna. (Kurt and I are the kids in this picture.)

When I was five years old, Mom Heather and Dad got divorced. Then Dad married Mom Pat.

They had three boys: Mark, Chad, and Cody. (They only had Mark when we took this picture.)

Mom Heather was going through a difficult time, and so we lived with Dad and Mom Pat, who pretty much raised us. Mom Pat has always been a mother to me, and I’ve learned much from her. When I got a little older, I reconnected with Mom Heather (who had married Paul, who is shown in this photo), and we formed a real bond. I discovered that I inherited much from her.

Out of respect and love, I call both of these wonderful women “Mom” because they deserve the title and all it represents in so many ways.

Dad has since married two more women—not at the same time, of course! He married Jo in 1985; they later divorced.

Then he married Justine, his current wife. 

I admire and respect these women as well, but I was grown and married with children when they entered our lives, and so it seems very natural to just address them by their first names.

As an aside, Megan, our oldest daughter, is not my biological daughter. Although I love her, she is Sterling’s daughter from his first marriage. Growing up, she mostly visited us on the weekends and holidays, and she has never called me “Mom.” I understand and respect that as well.

Now, I’m not an advocate of divorce. I think it creates very challenging situations for everyone involved. However, I am proud of the way our family has dealt with this situation and the acceptance and love we have all learned to show. We truly do all feel like we’re one big, happy (most of the time) family. When appropriate, we’ve even all gathered together for certain events, and that’s quite the experience!

I've also included photos of each of my siblings, starting with me, and our spouses, just in case you were interested.

Shelli and Sterling

Kurt and Joni 

Leslie and Danny

Vonna and Sean

Mark and Monique

Chad and Eliz

Cody and Shelley

So, that’s my family tree in a nutshell. I’m so grateful for my family—all of them, every branch, twig, and leaf. I wouldn’t be who I am today or where I am today without them!

Comments

[sara douglass]

I LOVE our big family... they keep life interesting! Cool post, Mom! xoxo

[Sharon Davis]

Very cool......I think every family has its challenges, but great families deal the best with these. I live with whole family. My husband and 4 four kids, my sister and her son and my mum and dad......not always easy , but a fabulous arrangement that has enhanced all of our lives.

[Lorna]

Aloha Shelli! Thank you for sharing your big ohana! What I gathered from your post is how much love you give and receive to everyone...that is so refreshing in this day and age. I love looking at your blog and reading what's going on with your life (a peek behind the scenes). Thank you so much for sharing! Hope to see you on Oahu for the Regional next month....or running in to you when you visit the Big Island's Kohala coast. :)

[sharon f / Createdbyu]

What a lovely story to share, Shelli! Hybrid families do have a lot of challenges and potential! My own Mom remarried when I was 9... and yes, there were challenges along the way but we, too were raised as one big family vs. "yours, mine, and ours", taught to respect one another and appreciate the wonderful gift of family. Congratulations to your family for making that possible!

[gabriella]

thank you for your post...I found it interesting. I also found it helpful and inspiring to read about other blended/hybrid families. I think that acceptance and love goes a long ways...which is one of the reasons I always love reading your note in the front of Stampin' Sucess. It always gives me something to think about. Thanks for making my day Gabriella

[christina s]

Thanks for the walk thru! I find that was we all get older our families blend and grow - one time friends become a huge part of our family... we couldn't have holidays without them. (ps- I'm over the moom with the new catolog!)

[Beth Hikel]

Shelli - thank you for sharing your family with us. It is wonderful to see all parts that make up the whole!

[Lydia]

You rock! What a great story! TFS!

[Sharlene]

Thanks so much for sharing your personal family tree. You really present yourself as an open book to us and I thank you for that. I'm sure you are even more loved and admired for your honesty and openess - allowing us to see what a 'normal person' you are behind your SU! title. Congrats on making your blended family work through the years.

[Marion Dornan]

Wow, you have a lot of brothers & sisters, I feel so lonely with just my one brother. ;-)
I love seeing you and Sterling together, I think it is so great that you two still enjoy each other's company after so many years together. Thank you again for sharing so much of yourself, I sure do enjoy your blog.

[Kay Kalthoff]

What beautiful pictures and such a joy to read about all the connections to the loves in your life. You set a wonderful example to all of us with mixed families. Thank you.
Kay

[Michele Zygmunt]

Wow! You keep amazing me with your sharing spirit. You're so inspiring.

Have a great day!

[Jamie H.]

Wow! How much you look like your dad is just crazy! Didn't realize that until these pictures. I was thinking you looked like your mom Heather in that first picture, but then the more I saw your dad..............
great blog entry. Love it!

[DLG]

Thank you so much for sharing. I Love your POSITIVE and honest outlook. I look forward to each entry. You certainly are a role model and touch so many lives.

[Tonya Smalley]

Hi Shelli, thanks for sharing your tree w/ us. I admire the way everyone can get along regardless of the divorce situation, in your family. It is something that I have wanted to happen in ours for a very long time. Our father's are similar in that my dad has been married 4 times but unfortunately he and my biological mom still to this day don't like being in the same room even after over 40 yrs of being divorce. So it's nice to see that it can be done and with great love.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Tonya

[Dina Anker]

Wow Shelli, thanks so much for letting us learn more about you. It makes it so much more personal to see where you've come from and most especially what a fantastic woman you've become.

Thanks for all that you do and share with us.

Love from Toronto and from me

Dina (Crazy Canadian Demo)

[Dawn Liedtka]

I love this post . . . I am always researching my own family tree and am fascinated by other people's families as well. Thanks for sharing this and thanks for taking the time to upload all of the beautiful photos. :-)

[Cindy Major]

Well, there is no denying where that bright contagious smile comes from! Loved seeing the pics of your big family.

TFS!
Cindy

[Julie Calkins]

Thank you for sharing your family with us and for creating an amazing company. I am an only child and would have given my left leg or arm to have a sister or brother. I often tell my four children that they are lucky to have each other, but to often they don't agree. I only hope and pray that when they are older to appreciate one another they will know what I was talking about.

By the way I love your new photo and the new look to your blog.

Take care and God Bless,

Julie Calkins

[Kerri]

Shelli, I am impressed by the way you handle your family. I am one of 3 girls and when we are all together it is always interesting. I hope each of your children realize how special it is to have such a close knot family and a mom who makes it possible.

[Jacki McHale]

Shelli,

I must say I love the red page layout here. Looks good!!

Thank you so much for not only sharing your family history, but so many fun pictures too!

Thank you!

Jacki McHale
(p.s. LOVE the new catalog!)

[Terry Molineux]

Shelli thanks so much for sharing your family story....it's wonderful what a giving person you are. It's so nice to see a person give all to all and be one great big family....

[Staci Miserlian]

OK, that one 70's or 80's photo that's snuck in there...is that you & Sterling?? It sure looks like you & I think it's kind of in the middle of the timeline.

Anyway, thanks for the whole layout of your family tree. It was very fascinating. What a lot of Bros/Sis & IL's you have!! That was sweet of you to share them with us.

[Amy Ward]

I gotcha Shelli. My tree looks quite similar. It's fun explaining the family tree, or better yet, the family gatherings, where mom and step mom cook the food together. People get a kick out of that. Seems (almost) normal to me!

[Aunt Kelli]

Hi Shelli,
I always enjoy your posts, it is a good way for me to keep up with everyone. I wish I had some of these pics...I have had many ask me the family tree info, and I am glad you posted it here. Our families are very blessed.
Hugs, Aunt Kelli